Tag Archives: stars and stripes

The Corpse of Punk Rock

“He smells exactly like the corpse of punk rock,” said one commenter when I posted this on Facebook a few years ago. More comments are below the photo.

The Corpse of Punk Rock

I can’t decide where he starts and where he ends. Thank god he doesn’t go for trendy fads. Sad thing is, he’s actually cute.

Don’t those backpack straps chafe on bare skin?

Sorry, dude, I only give out change after the second frost falls.

The double belts make sense—suspenders would interfere with the lines of his backpack straps, and all that metal crap attached to his pants clearly calls for help in keeping the pants in their upright and locked position.

I like the hair. On him, it works. I could never pull it off with such panache.

So retro.

I don’t want to look at this photo for too long, lest my browser catch Hep C.

Sid Vicious’s grandson?

The extras from “Mad Max” called. They want their everything back.

He is trying. So. Hard.

Obviously with a band. Where they went is more of a mystery.

Justin Bieber’s new backup dancers look like rough trade.

Anybody this conformist (and yes, this is conformist behavior—he has made his entire raison d’etre a statement about fitting a demographic) will conform in other ways too. And some day, he WILL conform in other ways—he will be behind a desk selling car insurance, or running an in-store customer service department, wishing some middle manager with bad breath and a cheesy sport coat would get off his back, and some asshole is going to find this photo and circulate it in the company email or on a public website with his name on it.

He does not roll out of bed looking this way. He was not born this way. This is a major project. And I can’t help but think the objective is to be noticed. So, I’m noticing.

The statement is all like “Look At Me, DAMMIT! Acknowledge my EXISTENCE!”

This is a good old British tradition. We *all* have to pass through this stage until we settle on “Tweed-on-top-leather-knickers-underneath.”

I Heard It in the Wind, and I Saw It in the Sky

I thought it was the end.
I thought it was the Fourth of July.

Thanks go to Ashley, who found this apocalyptic figure on April 15. Tomorrow we resume our normal round of Themes.

I Heard It in the Wind, and I Saw It in the Sky

Ugly-Pants Alert! Whose Broad Stripes and Bright Stars, Part II

These leggings are nothing new, but she took the patriotism up a notch with the scarf around her ass.

Happy Fourth of July!

Whose Broad Stripes and Bright Stars, Part II

Living in America

Hand to hand, station to station.

Our Independence Day celebration will go through tomorrow evening.

Living in America

On the Boats and on the Planes

They’re coming to America.

These intrepid travelers are our Specimens of the Week! They also open our Independence Day celebration, which will run through Monday evening.

On the Boats and on the Planes

Ugly-Pants Alert! Give Me Your Tired, Your Sore

Your huddled asses yearning to breathe free.

We conclude our Fourth of July Weekend Extravaganza with this flagging specimen and her companion. I feel as glum as she looks, thinking about having to go back to work tomorrow.

Give Me Your Tired, Your Sore

Independence-Day Poll! Yankee Doodle Boys

Yankee Doodle Boys
Who is more patriotic?

Exhibit A: For Spacious Skies

Yankee Doodle Boys, Exhibit A

 

Exhibit B: A More Perfect Onion

Yankee Doodle Boys, Exhibit B

Ugly-Pants Alert! Cousin Samantha

“Uncle Sam’s idiot niece.”—Secondshade

Cousin Samantha

American Gigolo

He’s here for you, ladies.

Have a happy Fourth of July! (Once you get over your nausea, that is.)

American Gigolo