Category Archives: I’m Going to Hell

Ugly-Pants Alert! You Can’t Teach an Old Dog New Tricks

But you can trick out an old dawg.

You Can't Teach an Old Dog New Tricks

Sikh and Ye Shall Find

I AM NOT SORRY.

The photo is a lot funnier with his eyes unblocked, because he was looking at me in a gently admonitory way, but I’m considerate like this.

Sikh and Ye Shall Find

Ugly-Pants Alert! In Flagrant Fields the Poppies Blow

Between the diamonds, row on row.

We break from our regularly scheduled Theme to wish our American readers a Happy Memorial Day.

In Flagrant Fields the Poppies Blow

Ugly-Pants Alert! Pearl Necklaces

Get your mind out of the gutter.

Pearl Necklaces

Psychic Reading

In her future I see a lot of money coming from strange men.

Psychic Reading

IslamaBad

She raped an Islamic art exhibition for the shorts. The pseudo-tartan of the shirt isn’t helping. I wonder how many more cultures she can offend.

IslamaBad

Does She Nazi the Problem?

Red bootlaces are sometimes associated with neo-Nazi and skinhead movements. Urban dictionary says that they are:

Color coded shoelaces used by the skinhead movement. Signifies that the skinhead has committed [sic] a violent act against whoever the heck it is skinheads hate these days.

Forum participants on that bastion of critical thought, Stormfront.org [warning: racist “white-pride” site], have remarked:

I’ve always heard red means you’ve “spilled blood” usually by fighting someone or attacking someone but necessarily killing anyone.

Boot laces were usually in support of your soccer team.… It did end up crossing over. I always hear:… Red: Honor the blood spilt to preserve the race.

The color [Red] shoelaces/suspenders means/symbolizes our “Blood” or “Race” with equally meaning in Paganism as well Christianity and both Pagan and Christian scriptures.… So when Skinheads … use Red and White shoelaces and or suspenders it means (The purity of the blood of our White race and people).

Growing up in the San Fransico [sic] bay area durring [sic] the early 80’s … [r]ed laces on oxblood Doc’s meant neo-nazi gang member.

I’m not suggesting that this woman is a neo-Nazi, skinhead, or anything like that. I don’t even remember what race she is. (If I had to guess I’d say white, not because she’s a racist, but because white hipsters are usually the ones who wear stupid shit like this.) However, she might want to explore the history of the red bootlace and alter her boots accordingly.

In any case, she is our Footwear Felon of the Week!

Does She Nazi the Problem?

Ugly-Pants Alert! Plagues of Egypt, Part II

We wish our Jewish readers a happy Passover. Don’t forget to vote in the poll in Part I, which was our Passover post two years ago.

Our regularly scheduled Theme resumes tomorrow.

Plagues of Egypt, Part II

Hot Flash in the Pan

“She looks like a menopausal cupcake.”—Secondshade

Hot Flash in the Pan

Barnes & Noble Savage

“I see more atrocious outfits here in the lap of rich white hipsterville than almost anywhere,” writes Ashley, who found this specimen in the Barnes & Noble café.

Barnes & Noble Savage